Tuesday, April 19, 2011

How to Be Sexy- For Men

He's bringing sexy back.  And white jeans.
Imagination Station:

Sterling Rambo here.  For those of you who don't know me (though, how could you not) I am the manliest man of the male species alive.  If women are from Venus and men are from Mars, then I'm the king of a steriod filled mega man Mars.  Oh yeah.  And it's man hairy too.

Anyway, I've made it my mission to teach men the art of being men.  So here's how to be sexy if you're a man.  For you ladies, this will make you less attractive.  Sexy time:

1. Get RIPPED.   If your veins are not popping out of your skin when you flex, then you are a disgrace to the man world.

2.  Don't manscape. Allow that inner grizzly bear to come out. You're on the prowl, so look like it.

3.  Don't buy deodorant.  Let your man smell ooze out of your man pores.  No lady will be able to resist those pheromones.  Remember that deodorant isn't for after showering, it's instead of showering.

4. Buy some snazzy man clothes.  I suggest glitter.  You can't go wrong with glitter.  It will catch the light and not only make your eyes sparkle, but it will make your entire body sparkle.  You'll be like a disco ball of love that no lady will resist.

5. Practice your sexy face.  Yeah, pout those man lips.

6.  Practice your sexy dancing.  Shake what your daddy gave you.

7. Gel up that man hair of yours.  Women like perfect hair, and if it looks like your hair can survive a death match with a gladiator, then you're good to go.  If your bald, buy Rogaine.  Nobody likes bald man heads.

8.  Wrestle a bear.  It will build up your muscle strength.

9.  Now go get 'em you man tiger.  Meow.

No comments:

Post a Comment