If you are unfamiliar with who Sterling Rambo is, then read my blog post "Chewed to Bits by Giant Man Eating Turtles"
Sterling Rambo here. You know, the manly man of epic man proportions. Epic manly proportions. Of epicness. Oh yeah, I’m big on the adjectives baby. But you know what else I’m big on, pleasing the ladies. So, I’ve decided to help you non-epically manly men with that special someone. Here’s how to build your woman a gazebo.
1) Find someone else to build a gazebo for your woman. Like a carpenter.
2) Hire that person.
3) Watch them build a gazebo for your lovely lady.
4) When your woman walks by, yell at the carpenter. Yell something manly like “I’m a man and I’m your boss, so work.”
5) After your display of dominance has gotten your woman all hot and bothered, ask her to fetch you a lemonade since you’ve been working so hard. It’s hot out. You’re hot… well, that is of course, if you’re me. Or the guy in the Old Spice commercials.
6) Before she hands you the lemonade, rip off your shirt and squirt some water on your abs. Ladies can’t resist glistening abs. I mean, look at that Edward Cullen dude.
7) Thank her for the lemonade.
8) Now that the carpenter is done making the gazebo, set up a moonlit picnic under it for you and your lady.
9) Play this song:
10) Your woman is wooed. Congrats, you manly stud muffin of man cake mix.